Longhorn in Paradise

A strange thing happened on the way to Memphis…due to inclimate weather, we were diverted to Little Rock, Arkansas. While passing the one hour on the ground to refuel and await the weather to clear, I was reminded of the following classic dialogue from the movie Airplane! A bit obscure, but after spending the good part of the summer of 1982 watching it on HBO about 200 times, you start to pick up lines other than “I am serious…and don’t call me Shirley.” So, to set the stage, this is the two PA announcers from the airport instructing drivers where to park, pick up passengers, etc…background noise, but a real gem in the annals of comedy writing:

Male announcer: The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in a red zone.
Female announcer: The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in a red zone.
Male announcer: The red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in a white zone.
Female announcer: No, the white zone is for loading. Now, there is no stopping in a RED zone. Male announcer: The red zone has always been for loading.
Female announcer: Don't you tell me which zone is for loading, and which zone is for unloading. Male announcer: Look Betty, don't start up with your white zone shit again. There's just no stopping in a white zone.
Female announcer: Oh really, Vernon? Why pretend, we both know perfectly well what this is about. You want me to have an abortion.
Male announcer: It's really the only sensible thing to do, if it’s done safely. Therapeutically there's no danger involved.

Absolute classic. And this was from 1980!

So, on my way to D.C. again, but starting out the week in Philly. Checking out the facility that publishes all the Red Cross training material. Did you know that the American Red Cross trains 47,000 people DAILY? That’s right. First Aid, CPR, even Babysitting classes. For more information, visit http://www.redcross.org/. ;-) Another public service announcement to ensure I hit my court-assigned community service hours from that unfortunate incident during the Natty Five 9s last tour.

By the way, major props to Greg’s “blade of grass” comment on my last post. If you haven’t read it, go back and do it now. You won’t regret it. Brought a smile to my face. For those of you who have seemingly dropped off the face of the Earth, i.e. are no longer posting, I can only assume it is due to my lack of consistency as opposed to the rather obvious fall-off in quality of my posts. I will try to get back to daily posts, but you will just have to deal with the lack of pictures. Maybe I will post them ad nauseum on the weekends or when we get our cameras out of storage…whichever comes first.

Another note on not posting…my freakin’ brother Brian has time to post in between battling insurgents and water balloon toting kids…what is your excuse? That is what I thought. If you think you are too busy with your pedicures and manicures and your “jobs”, chew on that for a while. I know my posts are long and, for the most part, self-indulgent, but that should not stop you from seeking some semblance of fame by commenting on my now world-famous blog. (it is like airports that have one flight to Canada or Mexico claiming to be “International”…I have a reader in Iraq, so I am now World Famous). Don’t make me beg people!

OK…back to your lives. I have much more to say (mostly because I am bored sitting on this tarmac still), but will wait until tomorrow so as to make this post less of a novel.

Much love to all!
jak