Longhorn in Paradise

And another thing...Just kidding. No more rants this week...I have just been thinking about what made California such a big draw for me. I am quite certain it wasn't Eight is Enough as I sometimes claim. More likely it was all the great songs that have been written about the Golden State. But, as I sit here thinking about all those songs I loved about California, it starts to dawn on me that if you really sit and listen to the lyrics, the songs are pretty down on Cali! I mean, I have a very fond memory of driving across the bridge between SF and Heyward and listening to Semisonic's "California" on the CD player thinking it was one of those great Soundtrack moments...sun was setting behind me, etc. What a great song about California! So passionate! Well, on closer inspection, here are the lyrics as he describes the apparently negative effect his time in Cali had on him:

I pulled my heart out of my chest
mixed it up in my mind with the best, freshest pieces of my soul

Chose the ones I loved the most
Drove them all down to the coast...
Threw them in a big black hole

So, that is not a real Tourism Board anthem....how about my all-time favorite, Last Resort by the Eagles. Yeah, this song talks about the nice breeze blowing through Malibu and all the pretty people and how nice it is in Los Angeles, right? Let's give it a listen:

Some rich man came and raped the land
Nobody Caught 'em
Put up a bunch of ugly boxes
And, Jesus, people bought 'em

They called it Paradise
I don't know why
Call some place Paradise
Kiss it goodbye

Hmmmm....sounds like strike two. I know! California Dreamin'. I mean that song is all about how great Cali is. And I loved that one...even the Bangles version! Let's check it out...

All the leaves are brown
And the sky is gray
I've been for a walk on a winters day
I'd be safe and warm...if I was in LA

Wait wait...this dude isn't even in California! Winter's Day? What the F? He just wants to be some place warmer. That is no great endorsement. Damn. OK. Surely John Bonham wouldn't lead me astray, right? Let's check out Going to California:

Spent my days with a woman unkind
Smoked my stuff and drank...All my wine
Made up my mind to make a new start
Goin to California with an achin in my heart

OK. This sounds good...not there, but taking action and he is 'achin' to get there. I like it...

Ride a white mare in the footsteps of dawn
Tryin to find a woman who's never never never been born
Standing on a hill in my mountain of my dreams
Telling myself its not as hard hard hard as it seems

What the F? What is he talking about now? That has nothing to do with California does it?

Shit...hmmmm. I've got it! It is all coming back to me now! This is it!

We've been on the run
Driving in the sun
Looking out for number 1
California, here we come
Right back where we started from

Or, maybe not. Maybe it was the show OC and not the song by Phantom Planet. Something to think about.

Actually, this whole thought process started when I heard the all-time greatest song about (or that subtly mentions) California the other day. I love this song and I wish we had played it in the Natty Five 9s. Check it out:

Ventura Highway in the sunshine
where the days are longer
the nights are stronger than moonshine
you're gonna go I know

Cause the free wind is blowin' through your hair
And the days surround your daylight there
Seasons crying, no despair
Alligator lizards in the air...in the air

dodododododood

Gotta love it!

Missin' Cali!

much love to all!

jak

EDITOR'S NOTE: Jak is not a happy camper today, so please, if you are under 18 please do not read this post. I cuss a LOT.

Over the past couple weeks, I must have thought of half a dozen different blog posts that I wanted to write...I just haven't taken the time. Well, I have had the time...I have been on the road in D.C. the past two weeks and in Ft. Lauderdale this week. Its just that the topics I have been thinking of have been emotionally draining...I guess I have been reading and watching the news too much. It is really upsetting. I liked it better when I just watched Sports Center all the time or spent my free time drinking and jammin' with Greg. I mean, have you read the papers lately? We live in a pretty fucked up country/world! Last week I read about this guy and his parents who raped a SIX year old kid and then put him in a fucking trashbag and left him on the side of the road...can you believe that??? It makes me so fucking mad. I mean really. Can you imagine even thinking of hurting a SIX YEAR OLD kid??? And then having so much disdain for him that you put him in a fucking trashbag? Jesus H Christ on a popsicle stick. It reminded me of that fucker that went into the Amish school and killed those little girls a few months back. I wrote a little bit about that, but it just takes too much out of me. I just keep wondering what the hell is wrong with people. What is it about society that causes people to do these things? Is it just human nature for some people? Is it drugs? Is it the pressure of living in a society where you are an outcast if you are not successful or beautiful? What causes people to pick on those who are unable to defend themselves? I post pictures of my kids on this site as much as I can so I can show off to the world how beautiful and wonderful they are. I can't imagine ever wanting to hurt them. And, if anyone did hurt them, I fear that I would be consumed with exacting revenge. Seriously. It kills me to think that way, but even in play situations when another 3 year old is mean to Liska, I want to go over and give the kid a wedgie. haha Not really, but I can see that it gets my dander up whenever I think Liska is getting her feelings hurt.

Anyway...I was watching TV last night as I was unable to get to sleep. There were two documentaries on about drug abuse. One about teens that got involved in drugs early and tried to get treatment...some were successful and others were not. But, the ending was very poignant and got me to thinking. Society tends to judge kids on drugs as being poorly raised or bad kids or miscreants or whatever. And the end of this documentary showed a mom who was fighting for insurance companies to cover inpatient and outpatient drug treatment for kids. You see, her kid died of an overdose the week after her insurance denied coverage of his admittance into a program. But, as she was making her speech she held up a blown-up picture of her boy. She said "I know that when you see these pictures and pictures of other young people who have died of a drug overdose, you think 'look at that druggie'. When we as parents look at these pictures, we think of cowboy boots and ballet shoes. Of looking into our baby's eyes and seeing the pure innocence and knowing that raising this gift of a young person would be trial and error, but we would do our best." I think this is something that is important for each of us to remember. If you see someone in your life that is suffering from an addiction...of any kind...reach out to support rather than pulling back and judging or condemning. It is a chance to make a real difference in someone's life just through acts of basic kindness.

Whew...glad I got that out. Very draining for me. Thanks for listening...I don't rant much, but when I do you better well listen! haha

Oh, I have been listening to a lot of DMB lately and I heard some lyrics that were very relevant to this blog:

If I had the strength to
I would leave you up
To your own devices
Will you not talk?
Can you take pity?
I don't ask much
But won't you SPEAK....please.

In other words, comment on the damn blog! :-)

much love to all!

jak

March 15, 2002 was a busy day for me. After 6 months in the mortgage lending business, I was beginning to hit my stride. I had partnered with a "slum lord" who had made personal loans to low-income families in central Texas as sort of "mortgages", but had grown tired of the business and wanted a return on his investment. So, he asked me to go visit each of these people, tell them they needed to refinance with my company because he was no longer interested in holding their liens. On this particular day, I drove up to Harker Heights and was having a particularly miserable time when I received a call from my friend Craig.

"Hey Jak...you want to check out South by Southwest tonight?"

"I don't have a wristband and I am about 100 miles away right now...plus, I am planning on hooping with McElvaney. How about tomorrow?"

"Dude, it is opening night...you have to go. Just get back here, grab a wristband and meet us at our house."

Since it had been a particularly awful day with a run-in with a Rottweiler and many blank stares from these people who didn't quite understand what was happening to them, I agreed. So, I headed back south to Austin.

Now, I am never one to skip a basketball game, so I got home, changed into my hoops clothes, packed some clothes for the evening and set out to get my wristband (for the uninitiated, you had to have a wristband to get into the 100 or so clubs that played host to SXSW). Before I got too far, I realized I was running late and that I should go straight to b-ball and then get my wristband. Which I did...great run...very hard...which meant very sweaty.

Feeling good, I got my sweaty self into my Ford Exploder and headed to Albertsons to get my wristband (note, this was about 10 miles out of the way, but that is what I get for poor planning). On the way over to Craig's house, I was in a rush and got nailed for speeding. First speeding ticket in years!

So, now I am really running late...but not too late that I can't stop by Mickey Ds and grab a number 10, Supersize with a Diet Coke (for those who don't know, the number 10 is the 10 piece Chicken McNugget meal).

Finally, I arrive at Craig's house...sweaty, basketball gear, hauling a big bag of saturated fat. I notice in the driveway a black VW Beetle. Not sure why I noticed it, I just remember really taking notice of that...anyway, I get inside and start telling Craig about the game and about how I need to take a "Mexican" shower (yes, I know it is inappropriate, but it seemed like the right thing to say at the time), could I borrow his bathroom sink. As he was imploring me to take an actual shower, the most amazing thing happened....one of the most beautiful girls I had ever seen appeared out of nowhere...from the back room of Craig's house actually, but it appeared to be from out of nowhere.

I kid you not, the next 10 seconds of my life happened in slow motion...I remember it to this day...she turned the corner, hair flowing, long legs moving toward us, incredibly white teeth and a ridiculously charming smile....hubba hubba, right? I heard no sound for this brief period, so I am not sure what was said, but the next thing I knew, I was being introduced to a Ms. Kathy Huang, aka Kat. With a mouth full of nugget, I wiped my greasy hand on my sweaty shorts and reached out to shake her hand. To her credit, she took the offer and shook my hand back. I then excused myself to go take my sink shower and spruce up for the evening...

Fast forward to a couple hours later...watching Eric Johnson perform, Kat started to get a bit squeamish. I asked her if she wanted to go get something to drink and she liked the idea. She broke off and went to the restroom and asked me to get her something. All they had was sodas, beer and Red Bull...thinking that she needed "wings" I bought two Red Bulls. She was less than thrilled at that and politely declined. So, stuck with two Red Bulls, I drank one and put the other one in my ample pockets (cargo pants). Later on in the evening, still feeling a bit sheepish, Kat was looking bad...so, as the gentleman I am, I offered her the warm Red Bull from my pocket. She looked at me like I had 3 heads. A little bit less politely than before, she declined. What a snob! Who would turn down a warm Red Bull that had a thin layer of cotton between it and my unclean, dried sweat body? sheesh! Well, my heart was in the right place.

To cap the evening off, I had by this time decided that Kat was somehow going to be a part of my life and sooner rather than later. So, at our last stop (another loud bar), I decided that full-disclosure was needed...some reason, this meant showing Kat how hairy my stomach was...didn't want her to gag at some later date when I revealed it and it became awkward, ya know. I also decided that the noise level at the bar was such that I needed to firmly place my hand on the small of her back as I leaned my ear down to her mouth so I could better hear the beautiful sounds she was emitting. ;-) I think this was the real deal sealer.

Anyway, the evening came to an end, I had met my future wife and I looked forward to seeing her again very soon....little did I know we would be engaged 4 months later, married a year to the day later, celebrating our first anniversary with a 2 month old daughter and living in California and now celebrating our 4 year anniversary with a 3 year old, a 10 month old and living in Tulsa, OK. It has been a real whirlwind!

So, Happy Anniversary Kathy Huang Knight...I knew from day one that you were the one. If I could have heard anything at the time, you may have had me at Hello, but you certainly had me at first sight. Here's to many MANY more years of love and happiness.

And to everyone else on this happiest of days....if the house is rockin, don't bother knockin'...just leave! ;-)

So, I have officially left California..as of about 11am this morning, I was exiting the state. Pretty crazy. Had a great last get together with the Browns, Renee, Steve, Charlie, The Crockers, etc. and was glad to have the opportunity to say goodbye yet another time. I am currently sitting in a hotel room in Albuquerque and will drive the rest of the way to Tulsa in the morning...drive has been good so far. Which leads me to the point of this post....

Music is an important part of my life...as, I believe, it is an important part of a lot of your lives. We hear certain songs and it can spark a memory or lift our spirits. There are times in our daily lives where we may be doing some tedious chore, but a favorite song will put an extra spring in our step and get us whistling while we work. And, even better, there are times in our lives when we are experiencing something special and an unexpected song comes on our radio or ipod and it is such a good fit, that the whole experience is enhanced. This does not happen often, but when it does, it is something to be thankful for.

Does anyone remember the movie Traffic? Steven Soderbergh directed it and shot the entire film with a yellow filter on the camera...it made the whole movie quite surreal. I thoroughly enjoyed it...what the hell does that have to do with anything you ask? what a random thing to say in the middle of this post you say? Patience young Skywalkers. Trust me.

At about 6pm MST tonight, I crossed from Arizona into New Mexico. I was heading East (obviously) so the sun was setting behind me. If you haven't been to western New Mexico it is filled with flat-topped mountains called mesas. The first mesa you see as you enter New Mexico is a brilliant, reddish-pink mesa. With the sun at my back, this mesa and the others around it were perfectly lit and absolutely beautiful. As I sometimes do when I am taken aback by nature, I start to think about deeper things like creation and life and death...just then, on my radio, Hootie starts singing "Not Even the Trees"...."Alone...as I sit and watch the trees...won't you tell me if I scream will they bend down and listen to me..." This will be my soundtrack for the next few miles...

I keep driving and the colors of the mesas turn from pink to red to yellow and I find myself in the surreal feeling of Traffic...my whole world has now turned yellow and it is beautiful.

Hootie continues to croon..."Little boy says to me 'where you goin' now son?' I said 'I don't know where I'm goin boy, I only know where I'm from."...

As the sun continues to quickly set behind me (somewhere over the Pacific I'm sure), it moves behind the large mesa next to me so I am thrust into the shadows, but the mesas ahead of me continue to be brightly lit...it now feels like I have moved into a darkened theater and am watching these mesas on the big screen and it is truly high definition.

"I see you in my dreams...and I wonder if your looking down at me and smiling right now...oh yeah, I wanna know, if its true...when He looks at me, can you tell me, does He realize, He came down here...He took you too soon."

So, the beautiful scenery around me has me thinking about the possibility of a Creator...Hootie (yes, I know his name is Darius, but I like to call him Hootie) is talking about a man who has lost his brother at an early age and is looking to nature for answers...and this always gets me thinking about my Aunt Janice who died WAY too early..which of course makes this big baby start to get verklempt. And Hootie accentuates it...

"Right now, I just can't see cause I'm feeling weak...and my soul begins to bleed..and noone's listening to me...not even the trees"

Probably more depressing a song than my actual feelings, but it seemed so fitting and it made that 5 minutes as I moved from Arizona into New Mexico absolutely memorable. Who would have thought that would be the highlight of the trip?

Anyway, one last word to those of you who know "the rest of the story..." and you know who you are...just to put a final exclamation point on everything, I arrived at the Burbank Marriott last night and there was a Lord of the Rings conference going on...so, I was immediately surrounded by dorky looking people in masks, capes or both. A fittingly odd end to an odd week.

OK. You people stay in touch!

Much love to all!

jak