Sunday, July 23, 2006

 

The Fly






Growing up, I am sure that most of us had our share of fears/phobias. I, for one, was afraid of monsters or boogie men. Hollywood drove some of my other fears as a wee lad....sharks (thank you Jaws!) and nuclear war (thank you The Day After). One thing that I am quite certain I was never afraid of was flies. I feel like I have always had a comfortable relationship with these bug-eyed, hairy backed flying creatures. As a young boy, I would use them to work on my hand-eye coordination as I swatted them mercilously. Of course, Keith "Grasshopper" Carradine made the use of a fly swatter so passe when he showed us that a fly could be caught with chopsticks. That was my goal for many years following the end of the Kung Fu series. Then, in Spanish class, one of my favorite sayings was "En boca cerrada, no entran moscas." Literally translated it means "Into a closed mouth, a fly will not enter.". In other words, zip it! Then, who can forget that great song by The Flys in the mid nineties...

Heyyyyyy...what's the point of this?

Heyyyyyy...what's your favorite song...maybe we can hum along

I think you're smart, you sweet thing

Tell me your name

I'm dying here

OOOOOOh Got you where I want you...yeah

So, needless to say, I don't have any issues with flies. BUT...my daughter has developed a VERY healthy fear of flies within the past week and it has the whole Knight household perplexed and just a little bit perturbed.

I shouldn't really use the term fear as this is certainly a phobia. I'm not sure how it started, but my money is that it has something to do with the night we locked her in her closet with about 100 horse flies. But, truly, could that REALLY have an impact on a person's outlook towards flies? I just thought the buzzing sound would soothe her and put her to sleep, but turns out...not so much. She was wide-eyed rocking back and forth in the fetal position in the morning when we went to get her. I guess we learned our lesson on that one...maybe bees would have been better as they buzz louder. Next time maybe.

Anyway, I digress....Liska is deathly afraid of flies now and it is having an impact on our lives. She literally starts to scream and cry whenever she sees a fly and has to evacuate the room. And she will not enter back into the room until her superman-esque daddy strums the guitar and sings the "Anti-Fly song". I can never remember the words to the song (even though I made it up), so it is always different, but it seems to help. Though, tonight she still refused to go into the family room even after multiple renditions. So, we have had to move some of her toys into the living room and we keep a close eye out for flies so that we can divert her attention from them if they come a-buzzin'. If any of you faithful readers have ever experienced something similar, please share your story. If we don't call attention to this issue, who will?

In the reality department, it has been about 100 degrees for 2 straight weeks here in Valencia and the AC is running non-stop. This does not seem to affect Hagen's development as he is still growing (Size 2 diapers already) and he is cooing like crazy and smiling and basically being a good kid. He slept for 6 hours a couple nights ago!! So, we have adjusted his schedule to include a bath and an extra feeding right before bedtime (11pm). In other words, whatever the hell we did that night, we are going to try to keep it going. Wish us luck!!

OK. I have to spend the rest of my peaceful weekend cleaning house and folding laundry. Then, it is off to bed and another week at the salt mines. EDITOR'S NOTE: For those of you unfamilar with this hokey vernacular, I have NOT left my job as Purchasing Manager at Nestle. Salt Mines is just a euphemism for going to work. Kapiche?

I hope everyone is doing well! Much love to all and have a great week!! Another EDITOR'S NOTE...I originally had a question mark after the "I hope everyone is doing well". My lovely wife mocked my poor grammatical efforts, and thus, with tail between my legs, have decided to let my adoring fans know that I am merely just one of you...not some uber-author superhero...but, just one of you.

P.S. aren't my kids talented in addition to their undeniable beauty?? :-) Liska reading sheet music at 2 years old? Hagen belly surfing on daddy at 2 months??


Comments:
I have the same fear only with Bees.. I am so parinoid of getting stung that I freak out. I was in my car once and a bee got in and let me tell you, all cars surrounding me got one heck of a laugh as my arms were flailing about. Thankfully I got it to vacate the vehicle and can laugh about it now. I hope Liska out grows the fly phobia but if she doesn't you at least can laugh about it, lol.....

DeAnn
 
I was always afraid of Bees too. The whole stinging thing. I had a neighbor in Michigan who would smack bees like you would smack a fly...with the palm of his hand against a solid surface. I couldn't believe the "courage" it took for him to do this! I just ran in the other direction when I saw one.
 
Hi Jason ...

It's me, JoAnne, and Karen beside me reading your blog while waiting for the Kentucky crew to arrive for dinner. We will have 18 for dinner. We're also celebrating Nile's first leave from the Navy since Christmastime. He celebrates his 19th birthday on Saturday. It's hotter than xo?,.% here right now ... heat index of 101 today ... steamy for Michigan.

Karen and I think you should "ditch" Nestle and take up writing. You're quite entertaining and perhaps the next Stephen King.

Well .... no more whining about us not responding to your blog.

Love you .... JoAnne and Karen
 
Say hello to all the Kentucky clan for me! And Nile as well. Sounds like it is going to be a fun time had by all.

I will be starting a separate blog shortly where I will be writing my first novel chapter by chapter and you all can comment on it as I go. Should be fun!!
 
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